So, it’s that time of year again. Christmas has come and gone, and we are turning our attention to the year ahead. Whether you see it as a fresh chapter, a transition, or just another day, it is almost impossible to get away from the ‘New Year, New Me’ chatter. It can feel like we are bombarded with calls to sign up for the offer that’s on at the local gym, to pick up a new hobby, to participate in Dry Jan, to set a different routine, to cook more at home, start meditating…. the list goes on. Whilst this can be a bit of fun it can also feel like a lot of pressure and poke at the belief that we are not good enough as we are. It is ok to go against this tradition. If making it through last year and the festive period was tough enough and you need time to rest and collect yourself in January without having to make an arbitrary new year’s resolution, then that is ok. If you feel content in where you are at after the holidays and want to continue as you are, that is ok. If you are looking for an out, then here it is, New Year New Me.. No thank you.
Of course, setting goals and having aims can be really useful, they can keep us focused, give us a sense of purpose and an opportunity to experience feeling that we have achieved something. However, if we have set goals because of external pressure or because it is what is done at this time of year, there is danger of them not being fulfilled and in turn can lead to a sense of failure which again feeds the voice that says you are not good enough. If you are thinking of making a new year’s resolution, perhaps ask yourself who are you setting it for? What is your motivation? Is this just a tick box exercise that you will forget about in a couple of weeks or is it something that has the potential to give genuine satisfaction? How can I hold grace for myself if I find it difficult? How can I be authentic in the resolution that I want to make and not be guided by what friends, family and society tell me I should be doing?
Setting an intention can be a gentler way to approach this time of year. An intention that you can hold in your pocket and take out when you need to, something that you can use as an anchor or a guiding idea rather than a task that needs to be fulfilled. How do you want to step into this new year? What do you want to look for or focus on? What or who do you want to be connecting with? How do you want to show up for yourself? These things might be less tangible but are just as important as any activity that can be done, class that can be attended or recipe that can be made.
